Guys. Get ready...because I'm about to be real candid with you.
I am an anxious person. I am not good with confrontation. I sometimes get stressed out about hugging someone before I've even met them. Is that weird?
So, last week I was feeling especially anxious and I wasn't giving myself what it needed to reset, even though I knew what it needed: a good stretch, meditation, a walk outside. Instead I gave in to my bad habits: picking at my split ends, obsessively checking my phone, and eating too much chocolate. These choices ended up taking over my whole day and unfortunately it bled into the next - I noticed myself making typos in important emails, feeling foggy, and all of the boxes next to my daily goals had been left unchecked.
But after a trip to see (and cry in front of) my therapist, we realized some things about me: not only am I an anxious person, but when I start to feel anxious, my brain goes into F R E E Z E mode. I feel stuck, extremely unmotivated, and the anxiety builds and builds, blocking me from getting anything done. Eventually I brush it under the rug because I'd rather say, oh well it's not that big of a deal, instead of confronting the real issues.
So, when I got home from therapy, I decided to give myself what it needed. I sat on the floor of my studio, listened to a guided meditation, and let the anxiety wash over me - feeling all the feelings and letting it alllll out. And I gotta say, it wasn't that bad...It's just a feeling, right?
After I let it out, did a few sun salutations, and took a deep breath, I suddenly felt a bit of calm. FINALLY! Then I felt the urge to be creative. HOORAY! I picked up my iPad Pro and started sketching just for fun, which quickly morphed into a bigger idea...I started illustrating how my anxiety felt, trying to recognize it and find its source. Then I started trying to make it feel less scary - Sketching out ideas for what I could do to help deal with the anxiety instead of letting it take control. So, out of stress, anxiety and a couple of rotten days, I made a first draft of this self-help Zine: Things to Do When Ur Feelin' Blue. The first zine I've ever made!
^ First Page ^
Page 3-4: But we can always cheer ourselves up...once we find the will power to get off the couch // Option 1: Move Ur Butt (and the rest of ur bod) // Option 2: Smile @ urself and say, damn I look good, cuz u do! Even if it's just a bb smile.
Pages 11-12: Option 9: Write down 10 things u r grateful for. // Ex: The sun. Breakfast. My Body.
As always, thanks for visiting! I wish you an anxiety-free day.